Thursday, October 23, 2008

Love Story

Having read that book yesterday, and its intense love story, I spent a while this morning reflecting on my own love story... and my Boo.

I first saw boo (Barney) in a class in college. We were older, don't let the college reference fool you. We weren't tiny little 18 year olds. We were in our mid 20's just finishing college late.

He was new to our school... I was just starting my divorce from the ole' ex. I was sitting with a girlfriend of mine in our class and in he walked. He sat at the back of the room... no doubt because he was nervous on his first day of class at a new school. I turned back to look at him again... damn he was hot. To my girlfriend next to me, I giggled and glanced at him..."I'd do him...." (we were having a conversation about the guys we'd do... ok so maybe that part was very 18ish.. but it was fun anyhow).

He was so rugged.. and I couldn't help but stare at him. He always rolled the sleaves of his thick winter sweaters up to his elbows so that his strong slightly scared forearms were exposed (mountain biking wipeout, don't let it impress you too much, he was drunk when it happened.. don't drink and mountain bike you dummy!) His hands were dirty... strong and rough. This was a man that worked hard... and his body showed it. His build was sleak, yet strong. He definitly spent a good amount of time doing physical activity, although at that time I had no idea what. I later found that he spent every waking moment at the gym... (super yum) and also that he raced a stock car... (hence the dirty hands) I wanted him so bad.... badly indeed.

We made it through that entire 12 week long semester with out much conversation between us. I had my eye on him though, and I was on the "hunt" if you will. Towards the end of the semester, the entire class was discussing what classes they were taking next. I mentioned mine... and to my delight he was in the same one. At this point I didn't even know his name... I'd never much paid attention during name call.

Once the next semester started, I arrived to my class and saw him sitting at the back again, with an empty chair next to him that I confidently and ruthlessly took. I had joked with him anyhow that I'd see him in our next class.... I later found out that he was absolutly astonished that I actually sat next to him.. he thought I was out of his league... :)

We talked.. he knew I was married... at that point I still had my rings on. I made some sort of scoffed remark about my then husband... and how we were starting a divorce process.

His face changed, and a look of saddness swept across his eyes. He stated that he'd divorced a year ago, and if I needed to talk or wanted a friend, he was totally there for me.

Ok so he's ruggedly handsome, hard working and sensitive... I melted. When I fell in love though... was when he made his first joke.... i'd mentioned growing up farther north in NH and secretly being a hick despite my dolled up outer appearance. I even confessed to having partaked in some cow tipping (yes its true). He laughed.... and he joked..."I've been cow tipping in france... they fall with an accent.... " and then he moo-ed with a french accent. (don't try to picture it, you had to be there)

That was it... I was hooked. Ruggedly handsome, hard working, sensitive with a sense of humor?? My God, I've found the perfect man.

A few weeks later he'd mentioned going to the movies after class... I guess he'd be trying to get me to take the bait and offer to join him.. it went totally over my head. But later that night, we spoke online via IM. And he was brave enough to outright ask me to go with him. He asked that it not be a date, but just a "hang out". (he'd been very badly burned by his ex-wife and was afraid, I can't say I blame him)

We met after I got out of work and he was done working on his racecar... and he drove me to the ocean in the middle of march. It was freezing. But he wrapped his arms around my shoulder and we sat watching the waves role in and talking about life. He had dreams of moving to NC to work on nascar race cars... I wanted a husband that wasn't a sloth like my current one and kids someday. Neither goal was something the other really wanted yet we were intrigued by one another.

We headed off to the movies to watch Old School.

Let me start by saying I am a laugher. When something's funny I crack up.. I can't help it... and once is starts, I can't stop. Needless to say I laughed my ass off during Old School. Its funny because he'd already seen it with a few of his guy friends. But on the ride home, he'd told me hadn't laughed much the first time, but that he couldn't stop laughing while watching it with me... he said I'd somehow made it funnier.

During the movie we stayed fairly innocent. He'd rested his hand on my knee... and of course his sleaves were roled up so I rested my arm and hand on his amazingly sexy forearm which I coudlnt' help but stroke lightly with my fingers and trace all of the veins and muscles. It was electric when I touched him.

He dropped me off at work, where I could pick up my car and drive home. There was no kiss... after all we were just hanging out right? He did play some music for me... I had been joking that the used car I was bombing around in, was a pimp mobile. I can't even remember what it was now.. a buick mabye? so he played Big Pimpin for me... and we laughed. It was our song for quite a while.

I left his truck craving more...

He called me a few days later, and asked me out again. He said his sister was going away for the weekend skiing with her husband, so he'd have their apartment all to himself. (he moved in with her after his divorce). He wanted to know if I'd like to come over for chinese take out and watch a movie. It was St. Patty's day.

I remember I wore a frilly summer skirt, with a blue tank top (it was an exceptionally warm day in march) he commented on my arms when he picked me up... that I was pretty rugged for a girl. haha I was that time I was also a gym rat... I ran 6 miles every day and also lifted weights at the gym. He was so chivelrous.. he lifted me up into his truck, held my hand when I jumped out to ensure I didn't fall.. he was so protective, still is.

We picked up chinese food... and headed to his place with a movie he'd picked up for us. It was The Usual Suspects. It was an old movie at that time, but i'd never seen it and he'd insisted it was really good.

We ate, nervously talking, alone for the first time. After cleaning up our dishes, he started the DVD player and he plopped on the couch. I sat down, in the middle of the couch.. now it was my time to be shy.

He looked at me... and simply said "get over here" with a confidence I hadn't expected from him. His arms were out.. waiting for me as he sprawled out onto the couch. I laid down in front of him, his arms engulfing me with his scent and strength. My God I wanted him then. I wanted him so badly I could taste it.

I dont' remember anything about that movie. I dont' think I watched one second of it. All I could think about was his body behind me.. his arms touching me... and his head just above mine.. His lips so close to me... so close to mine... I was ready to melt into him... it was excrutiating. I know we talked.. he mentioned things about the movie.. I didn't listen.. I just watched his lips move.. waiting for him to see how much pain I was in... waiting for that moment that would cross us both over into something different... into something physical. He is so much more patient than I. More calculating, more controled. I can't wait for anything, cooking is enough to drive me crazy. When I want something, I want it now..instant grafification.

He takes his time, he savors the moment...and he can wait teasingly and impossibley long. I say this as if it took hours.... but honestly, if I had to guess, it was probaby only 20 mins.. I'm sure he noticed me staring at his mouth longingly, he noticed how stiff I'd gotten lying next to him... i'm sure he could hear my heart pounding out of my chest.. So he simply stopped talking..... and he kissed me. Softly, but confidently. I could tell he wanted me just the same.. yet he was so restrained... unlike I who completely engulfed him... he was slow... methodical almost. not letting his hunger take over like i'd let mine.

I know you're dying for more ooey gooey details, but there will be none. I will simply say that thus began our love story. And now, almost 6 years later, i'm reflecting on that one pivotal moment when it all began. I will tell you that day he was a lucky Irish man. Which is something he gloats about even now. But it was I who was lucky. Because he really is the perfect man, still is the perfect man.

He chose not to go to NC to pursue his nascar dream. It was tumultuous, and painful... and in the end after a long drawn out tear filled month, he chose me. He chose to give up on a dream he'd had since he was a child. He chose to stay here with me and have a family and a marriage. I know it was a sacrafice he'll always wonder about. And I'm fine with that. Because when he comes home from work all dirty and sweaty and tired, he looks at me with those eyes... the ones that tell me that he loves me in every way possible. And then picks up our little red headed daughter and swings her around in the air with a huge smile. He's happy. Way happier than I'd ever thought he'd be with this decision. I dont' think he new this dream was ever possible for him. So he never bothered to have it.



*~*Lis*~* said...

you can sooooo tell you just read a book with romance in it! :)

and when i first read NC I "saw" NYC and was trying to figure out what nascar team was in NY! hahaha

OMG - my word verification for this post is (no lie!) annes. HAHAHAHAHA!!!

ann said...

hahaha nice. and yes, i definitly just read a love story lol

and did I mention on my mornign chit chat with Ryan this am.. she mentioned that had I died in a plane crash on the way to disney, she'd glady have taken care of barney for me? oh my evil friends and thier lusts for my husband HAHAHAHAHHAHAA I guess it made me appreciate him today lol

*~*Lis*~* said...

I would have been second runner up if say you were in a plane crash and chuck and ryan somehow got in a car accident or something! sorry but he's a hottie! I had that dream about him once - swoon..... HA!

anabelle said...

There are quite a few women in line.. you may have to jump into a battle pit of somesort and just all go at it until someone wins. Although I'm not sure he'd be totally opposed to have an entire harem??? he's asked quite a few times if i'd be intersted in that now lol

You guys are horrible! but you're right, he is a hottie... and nice, and smart and sweet and funny and sensitive.... yup he's perfect.

nah nah nah boo boooo!!!! hehehe